Feb 7, 2022Member-onlyIs Part of the Healing Process Other People?How eating disorder rehab taught me more than how not to starve myself. — The first time someone suggested “rehab” to me, I was sitting in my therapist’s office in tears. “I think it could do you some good,” she stated, with concern etched into her light blue eyes and a warm tone you’d expect from someone you pay $150 an hour. I’d been…Self7 min readSelf7 min read
Published in Mind Cafe·Jan 9, 2022Member-only7 Ways to Reinvent Your Dating LifeFed up of the same old cycle? Try these things instead. — Say you have a car that isn’t working. What do you do? Continue trying to drive it, hoping it miraculously fixes itself? Or do you take it in for a fine-tuning, replace parts that need replacing, and try to upgrade it from what it was before? Chances are, you’d choose…Relationships5 min readRelationships5 min read
Published in Mind Cafe·Jan 4, 2022Member-only5 Resolutions to Improve Your Relationship in 2022Here’s the thing about New Year’s Resolutions: people do them all wrong. They get too caught up in the pressure of January 1st. If they slip up, they lose all motivation and give up. But I like to think of them as an ongoing goal. “Mess ups” are just part…Relationships6 min readRelationships6 min read
Published in Mind Cafe·Dec 6, 2021Member-only6 Signs Someone is Emotionally Attracted to YouBecause relationships aren’t just about physical attraction. — Physical attraction is primal. To have someone be physically attracted to you feels great, sure. But it doesn’t say much about who you are, beyond your face symmetry and physique. When it comes to love and relationships, our deepest desire is for someone to be emotionally attracted to us. Ego…Love5 min readLove5 min read
Published in Hello, Love·Nov 16, 2021Member-onlyWhy Couples Therapy Isn’t Just For Failing Relationships“You’re an odd couple,” our therapist said to my boyfriend and me, “most people only come when their relationship is failing miserably. The fact you’re here to improve your relationship before it’s broken is an anomaly.” While that comment boosted my ego a bit, my therapist’s observation from decades of…Relationships5 min readRelationships5 min read
Published in Mind Cafe·Nov 13, 2021Member-only4 Things I Learned In Couples Therapy About CommunicationMany people think couples therapy is for people who have a failing relationship. But those people are shooting themselves in the foot. No matter how great of a match you are with someone, there will always be issues. …Relationships5 min readRelationships5 min read
Published in Mind Cafe·Nov 10, 2021Member-onlyThe Reason It Feels Like Life Is Working Against YouAnd how to change that. — Have you ever felt like you’re broken? That the people around you have everything figured out, but you didn’t get the memo for whatever reason? Same. That’s probably what exacerbated my depression and anxiety. But I don’t want to focus on mental illness in this article. …Life5 min readLife5 min read
Published in Hello, Love·Nov 6, 2021Member-only5 Signs Popular Dating Advice Isn’t For YouLove is nuanced. What works for one person won’t work for another. — Love is nuanced. What works for one person won’t work for another. And it’s because of this that I don’t like people who give dating advice like it’s one-size-fits-all. That’s how popular dating advice has functioned up until recently. It had everyone following the same rules and being molded into…Love5 min readLove5 min read
Published in Hello, Love·Nov 4, 2021Member-onlyAn Exercise Every Couple Should Do Before Getting EngagedA couple of weeks ago my boyfriend and I did an exercise with our therapist. — A couple of weeks ago my boyfriend and I did an exercise with our therapist. “You plan on being together long-term, right?” He asked. We nodded. “Good, then this exercise is going to help ensure you’re on the same page as one another, something most couples never do.” One by…Love5 min readLove5 min read
Published in Hello, Love·Nov 3, 2021Member-only4 Communication Habits That Can Predict The End of a RelationshipWhen my boyfriend and I first showed up for couples therapy, our therapist called us “weird.” He explained that most couples didn’t come to him when things were great; they came when their relationship was on the brink of ending; that the distance between them became so big, they had…Love4 min readLove4 min read
